Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Somebody help me...

Why can't I love people? Especially when I want to, need to, and try to really hard? Why am I not nicer? If we as Christians don't love people, who's gonna? They will know us by our love, right? Is there a special prayer I can pray so that He'll drop it off in my heart? Lord, please help me to love everyone and hold my tongue and my thoughts when I can't!

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Cheers to newness

I've always belonged to the school of thought that lines and principles and precepts protect. They ward off danger. They prevent scars. Most of my life has been lived with this outlook at the forefront. I'm definitely no scaredy-cat, so please understand that I hide behind this mentality most often in reference to matters of the heart.

In terms of calculating risk and acting on the conclusion, that's usually not my style. I would jump out of a plane with a parachute (but haven't done this yet). I would fly across an ocean to spend a month in Europe with a classmate. I would move across the country to live and work in a land where I know no one. Okay, so none of it's that dramatic. I'm just trying to make a point. My point is that these things sound exciting. Sign me up.

However, any social situation that I haven't initiated or somehow obtained semi-conrol over freaks me out. Neurosis for days. I think too much, talk too much, and no one enjoys it. Ask family and friends. They will confirm.

But today, I took a step. After much mulling (on my part) and encouragement (on my friends' part), I left those precepts (read: the cage) by the wayside and did something out of character. And it was, of course, nothing to be afraid of. No big deal. That's what's on the other side of that fear: nothing lost. And maybe a little freedom gained.